Friendship is Like Dating

Friendship is like dating, Megan Hall, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker

Let’s be honest making friends as an adult can be difficult and kind of awkward. It’s not as easy as going up to someone and saying ” Hey let’s be friends”. Although we all wish it was. Friendship is like dating. It’s kind of messy and takes time but when you find the right person it works out in the end. Unfortunately it also means you will end up with some heart ache too.

Last year I had this friend who I was super close to. We did everything together. We laughed, we cried, we shared our whole life stories, but then it started to fall apart. She started pulling away from me and shutting me out. It wasn’t one of those friendships that ended and you knew it ended. It was kind of like when a guy just stops returning your phone calls and avoids you out in public. He doesn’t officially break up with you so you don’t really know it’s over until you see him with someone else. Itwas like that but I didn’t know it was over until she deleted me off Facebook.

How Friendship is like dating

  • You don’t want to tell them your whole life story on your first date (hang out). Ease them into that mess.
  • It takes several dates before you’re in a relationship (friends). Consistent time together is so crucial here.
  • Opposites attract but having nothing in common makes things difficult. Don’t just look for people just like you.
  • You have to let them know the real you or it will never work out. Lack of transparency leads to distrust and drama.
  • Not every date will turn into a second date and you won’t marry (become BFFs) every person you date.

Good news is even though building friendship is like dating it’s not exactly like dating. You won’t have to choose only one BFF. You can date (build friendships with) several people at once. Everyone you are dating can hang out and it won’t be weird. There’s a lot of similarities between dating and friendships but there is a lot of differences too.

Not every friendship will lead to that best friend (marriage) and not every friendship will last (divorce) but we can enjoy the time we have with our friends in the meantime. It’s ok to decide after some time of spending with someone that you don’t click with them. Sometimes people change, you or them, and the relationship doesn’t survive that change. Even though it’s sometimes messy, hurtful, and difficult it’s completely worth it when you find your friends.

Remember you are beautiful, you are worthy, you are amazing, & YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

If you want more information on the topic of friendship check out these resources.

Blog Posts:  Women Need Healthy Friendships & Not Everyone Will Be Your Best Friend

The Inspired Women Podcast Episodes: Episode 9 FriendshipsEpisode 68 Friendships & You, & Episode 28 with Shasta Nelson

What’s in Your Space

What's in Your Space, Megan Hall, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker

This year I made a goal to be more mindful of what’s in my space. That means the people or things that are around me. I realized that there were many people/things that I allowed in my space that didn’t make me feel good. Yet I continued to allow them into my space but no more.  Have you ever thought about what’s in your space?

Things/people either give you energy, take away energy or do a little bit of both. Ever been around someone that when you left them you felt like all the energy was sucked out of you? Those are the kind of people/things I am no longer allowing in my space. I have to be protective of my energy and so do you. Being drained of energy is just no fun.

How You Can be mindful of what’s in your space:

1) Check in with yourself. What things/people leave you feeling emptied?

2) Ask yourself: How can put space between these things/people and myself?

3) Have a conversation if necessary/possible. “Hi _____. I value our relationship but lately spending time with you has been making me feel pretty bad. I would love to change this if possible if not we will have to stop spending so much time together.”

4) Take Action. Start minimizing interaction with these things/people immediately. 

5) Spend more time with those things/people that make you feel good. 

It is important we protect our energy. No one wants to go through life feeling drained or resentful. Sometimes genuine conversations can help and other times we have to accept this is the way certain people are. There are some people I won’t have a conversation with because I know that it will cause to much drama. Having a little interaction with people/things that drain us is important.

Keep in mind these people/things may not drain everyone’s energy. This is not a time to wage a full out war on them. Instead it’s a time to protect your energy by putting up boundaries between you and this person/thing. For me there was a group of individuals that I continually felt drained after leaving their presence. I realized they are not my people and that’s ok.

If you need any help with this topic feel free to check out my article on Creating Boundaries.

Remember you are brave, you are kind, you are beautiful, and YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

Your Mindful Morning Starts The Night Before

Your mindful morning starts the night before, Megan Hall, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker

Oh that elusive thing we all call sleep. Even though it is one of the most important functions of our body it seems to be the thing that always comes in at the bottom of our priority list. Don’t get work done during the day? It’s ok I’ll just stay up later. Want to binge watch the latest Netflix show? It’s ok I’ll sleep when I’m dead.

The problem is EVERY essential function of our body requires sleep. Everything from your immune function to your metabolism to your memory and everything in between. It’s a common misconception that our mind is still during sleep. It’s actually doing so much to help ud be our best. Sleep is a crucial piece to our physical, mental, and emotional health.

5 reasons your mindful morning starts the night before

1) Sleep deprivation affects our emotional health. Lack of sleep can alter our mood significantly and not in a good way. 

2) Sleep deprivation affects our memory. During sleep our entire day is processed into memories without it we struggle to create new memories. 

3) Sleep deprivation affects our immune system. Trying not to get sick because of that important meeting? Better be getting some quality sleep the week before. 

4) Sleep deprivation affects our productivity. We are slower at performing tasks when we don’t have enough sleep. 

5) Sleep deprivation affects our mental health. Those with mental health conditions will experience this the most. Even if you have never experienced a mental health condition you might experience one after sleep deprivation. 

Sleep deprivation can have serious effects on our personal and professional life. Sleep isn’t just important to some people it’s important to all people. Only 1% of the entire population needs less than 8 hours of sleep a night. It’s very unlikely that we are one of them.

I shared in the Importance of a mindful morning how important a good morning routine is. Your mindful morning starts the night before. Consider a good night’s sleep the pregame to a good morning routine. I know it can be difficult to know what will help us get enough sleep. That’s why I created the Blissful Sleep Cheat Sheet with the top ten tips of getting a blissful nights sleep.

It’s time for us to make sleep a priority. Remember YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

Learn & Grow Through Other People

learn & grow through other people, life coach, motivational speaker, Megan Hall

One of the best ways of learning is through experiencing something ourselves. The problem with that way of learning is it can take a long time and be very painful. Even though my life experiences have led me to being the powerful life coach I am today I still like to learn & grow through other people. Why? It saves me the time of having to learn everything by finding or experiencing it myself.

Recently I made the decision to go back to college to pursue a degree in psychology. My own experiences, healing, and growing have allowed me to learn so much about psychology already but I want to speed up the process. That’s why I am going to learn from other people. We can speed up the process by learning and growing through other people. There is a vast amount of knowledge out there and instead of sifting through it ourselves we can learn from people who already have sifted through that knowledge or had those experiences themselves.

How we can learn & Grow through other people:

1) Work with a coach.

If you can think of something you would like to work on there’s probably a coach out there who can help you. 

2) Take a course.

There are courses on a wide variety of subjects. The reason coaches trump courses in my book is you get accountability and a tailored to you experience with coaches while courses are more general information. 

3) Conferences/Summits.

I love the variety of speakers and topics that can be covered at a conference or summit. The only set back is many times you are energized afterwards but may not implement what you learn, the follow through can be lacking.  

4) Podcasts/videos. 

Again a wide variety of topics that you can hear on podcasts/videos.  These are generally free but still lack the accountability and tailored to you experience.

5) Online Communities (like Facebook Groups).

Also a generally free resource. There are online communities on almost any topic you can think of. One downfall is you might have to sift through a lot of information that’s not relevant to you before you find what you need. 

With the internet information is at our finger tips. So many people are willing to share their expertise with you so you don’t have to go learn it all yourself. There’s everything from how to run Facebook ads to how to improve your health ready for you to discover. If you aren’t sure where to start ask your friends family, or trusted advisors for recommendations.

I always tell my teenage daughter to learn from my mistakes. That is essentially what I am talking about here. You don’t have to go out and make all the mistakes yourself to learn the lessons. You can learn from people who have been there and done that. Like one of my clients said “I could have done all of this on my own but it would have taken me years instead it only took me six months!” That’s what I am talking about when I say to learn & grow from other people..

Remember YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

Resources you might enjoy:

Looking for a coach? Schedule a 30 minute connection call with me HERE

If you are a military or first responder spouse you will love 2018 Military Spouse Wellness Summit: Renew You

Tune into The Inspired Women Podcast

Join The Inspired Women Community