Preventing Groupthink

Preventing Groupthink, Megan Hall, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker

I like to think of groupthink as the sheep mentality. It’s kind of like the way sheep follow each other and do everything together. Can groupthink be a good thing? Yes when you are working as a team and everyone is able to come to a common solution that is helpful. Where it goes bad is when individuals don’t want to or don’t feel like they can or just don’t think for themselves. This is where the word conformity comes into play. Everyone conforming to the “norm” of the group.

Diversity is what makes the world go round. Without it we would not see creative thinking or be able to advance in our technology or expand our minds. Thinking, acting, and believing the same as everyone else puts us at a distinct disadvantage. Groupthink stunts our personal growth and  makes us cookie cutter versions of each other. How boring is that? To me that’s super boring. I love to see people thinking for themselves and not going along with the status quo.

preventing groupthink starts with us

1) Diversify the people you hang out with. Don’t just hang out with people who think, act, believe or look like you.

2) Listen to opposing views with an open mind. 

3) Get your information from a variety of places. Even try getting it from new places once in awhile. 

4) Have new experiences. New experiences = new people. 

5) Question everything. Don’t be afraid to place devils advocate. 

We really need to check our belief and opinions. Does everyone around us believe the same thing? Are we closed off to opposing views? Why do we even believe these things in the first place? I had a conversation with my husband about profanity that helps explain this. I believe words are only words. We decide what power they have by how we use them. The only reason some words are considered taboo is because someone somewhere made them that way. Back in the day ass meant donkey and bitch meant female dog.

The problem with groupthink is it prevents us from thinking outside the box. Instead of questioning everything we just go along with it. In extremes this is how Nazis and cults were formed. We must be willing to decide on our own how we feel about the world. That may mean being different than your best friend or your sister. That’s ok because that’s how change occurs. Remember you are brave, you are beautiful, you are amazing and YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

3 Things We Need To Do Before Adversity Strikes

Adversity, Megan Hall

March 28th I received a call no mom wants to receive, it was my oldest daughters father telling me our daughter was in the hospital 600 miles from me. The next two and a half weeks were a whirlwind, every day it seemed something changed. I drove over 3,000 miles in that time finding myself in the end physically, mentally & emotionally exhausted.

There have been days since that call that I have thought “I don’t think I can take much more”  but then I do. It’s amazing how resilient a person can be when they have to be. There are so many things I attribute to my resilience but there are three main things that helped me hold it together.

3 Things We Need To Do Before Adversity Strikes

1) Create a solid support network. Several people we can turn to when shit hits the fan.

2) Develop and utilize a self are routine. That means taking care of yourself BEFORE adversity strikes as well as after. 

3) Work on personal development. That means continuing to learn an grown on a DAILY basis. Seek out a therapist and/or coach to help you. 

Without all the personal development, including many hours with my therapist, and a solid self care routine I would have been a wreck during those weeks of chaos. Even though my PD & self care became very inconsistent during those three weeks because of the constant changes that occurred. Because I had already built those habits they didn’t take as much effort to implement when I could.

We can’t do this on our own try as we might. We each are only capable of so much. That’s why my #1 tip is that support network. Without the people who offered their time, houses, and listening ears I would not have made it through. Those were all people I spent time building relationships with BEFORE this all happen. It’s important to spend time cultivating those relationships so that you aren’t all alone when shitty things happen.

We all have negative experiences in our lives. These three things will help you significantly when they do. Remember you are brave, you are strong, and YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall

5 Social Media Boundaries We Need

Social media Boundaries, Megan Hall

Social media is a fickle animal. I have a love/hate relationship with it. Some days I love it so much and feel excited/motivated when I get off. Other days I hate it and feel drained when I get off. It’s not just the people that drain me but it’s the time I spend on social media as well.

The more comfortable I’ve become with setting boundaries around my social media the less I feel drained. Social media can be whatever we want to make it. It’s our space to decide what we want to do with it. We decide the privacy, who we connected to, and what information we see.

5 Social Media Boundaries We Need

1. Time Boundaries: How much time will you spend on social media daily

2. Privacy Boundaries: What’s public and what’s private

3. People Boundaries: Who will you allow to be connected to you on Social Media

4. Content Boundaries: What do you want to see in your newsfeed

5. Business Boundaries: How do you want businesses to interact with you and what businesses do you want to interact with

By setting these very basic boundaries we can significantly reduce the amount of stress and overwhelm that comes with social media. This is a time for inner reflection. Ask yourself what don’t you like about social media or what stresses you out about it. Once you’ve figured that out revisit the above boundaries and ask which one you need to work on.

It can be really easy to think that the only option is to delete social media altogether. Even though that is an option you don’t have to choose that option. By tightening up our boundaries and not wavering we can significantly reduce that hate side of the relationship. Your social media is yours. You get to curate it to look/feel anyway you want.

Want to hear more about social media? Check out this article: Is Social Media Killing Our Vibes. Remember you are beautiful, you are brave, you are amazing, and YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!!

XoXo
Megan Hall

PS Remember just because you set boundaries does not mean your social is private.  No matter the privacy settings whatever you post is owned by that platform.

When My Daughter Said I Was Fake

When My Daughter Said I Was Fake, Megan Hall, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker

Last week my teenage daughter had a medical emergency in NY where she was living with her  biological father. Within 48 hours I was driving up there to be with her and create a plan to get her the help she needs. While we were in the hospital discussing the possibility of my daughter moving back with me her father turned to me and said “She says you are fake.” I was so confused and embarrassed that my teenage daughter would be saying that about me to others.

Over the course of the next five days as we met with doctors and she was admitted to a new hospital the idea that I was fake kept coming up. I even brought up this comment to her and asked why… the answers weren’t pretty. It wasn’t until I came back home that the implications of this comment really set in. My 15 year old daughter thinks I pretend to be something I am not. Why would she think this? What kind of example am I setting? Getting the answers required a lot of self reflection.

HOw I Can Stop being fake

1) Instead of saying my family is a top priority I need to show them they are by being intentional about the time I spend with them.

2) Make sure the at home me and the online me are on the same page. 

3) Don’t share everything on social media. Transparency is important but there needs to be boundaries. 

4) Accept that my kids did not sign up to be public figures and respect their boundaries around that. 

5) Be more open to the feedback of my children especially when it comes to me as a person or a parent. 

This was a wake up call for me. It was painful to reflect on where my daughter’s perception might be right. During this reflection I saw where my public persona diverged from my private one. As a teenager who uses social media my daughter saw this too. It’s difficult to admit when someone might be right in criticism of you but in order to learn we must swallow our pride.

It was a blow to my ego to have a light shined on my inauthenticity. I want to be someone my children look up to and learn from. The only way to do that is to be more present with them and be sure I’m in alignment both publicly and privately. This will be a whole new experience because I didn’t even see this problem before it was pointed out to me.

I share this in hopes that you can learn from this mistake as well. There is never a time that we will be done learning and growing. Remember you are brave, you are bright, you are amazing, YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!

XoXo

Megan Hall