This week I will celebrate my 32nd trip around the sun. Looking back there are so many lessons I’ve learned but in honor of this birthday I am going to share 32! Many of these things I’ve shared over time in The Inspired Women Community or on The Inspired Women Podcast but this is a consolidation of all of that. Will these lessons always be true? Maybe! In the next year I will probably learn new & different ones.
32 lessons I’ve learned in 32 years
1) Life isn’t always fair.
Yes I believe in karma. I also believe that sometimes shitty things happen to good people. Adversity does not discriminate.
2) Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they are good people.
We have to set those boundaries with family. Just because someone is blood or pushed you out their vagina it does not mean they have the right to a spot in your life.
3) It only takes one decision to change the trajectory of your life.
This can be good or bad. I’ve made decisions that changed my trajectory for the worse then later made decisions that changed my trajectory towards the better.
4) Profanity does not mean someone has a limited vocabulary or that they are not intelligent.
Y’all some of the most intelligent people I know swear and they believe that profanity just adds to their vocabulary. I mean sometimes we just need a shit added in there for emphasis.
5) Change isn’t always a bad thing.
In most cases change is good. As we age we learn and grow in new and amazing ways. In order to do that change is necessary.
6) We need friends.
Friendships are necessary for our physical, mental & emotional health. Not any friendships though. Those friends who lift you up and support you.
7) Forgiveness is necessary.
When we don’t forgive we drag that shit around with us forever. It’s not hurting the other person it’s only hurting us. By doing this we are allowing that person to continue to hurt us long after the initial hurt. That’s no way to live.
8) Even though we have come a long way we still have a long way to go.
Seriously though! The fact that there still is some very racist, homophobic, bigoted people out there on the planet means we still have a long way to go.
9) What you want today may not be what you want five years from now.
What I wanted at 27 is no where near what I want today. I had full plans to be a personal trainer and make my own work out videos.
10) Everything we put in our bodies effects our bodies.
Whether that’s what we are eating, what we are listening to, the air we breathe, etc… It all makes a difference.
11) There is no such thing as perfect.
There’s just not. Embrace those imperfections because we all have them.
12) Technology is helping and hurting us at the same time.
Look at how much we are on our phones or computers in a day. It’s addictive.
13) Our physical, mental & emotional health are all important.
If your mental health is shit eventually your physical health will be and vice versa.
14) There will never be a point where we look and say “I made it.”
It’s human nature to keep striving towards something new. There’s never a time that we know everything and have done everything we want to.
15) Mental illness does not discriminate.
It doesn’t matter what race, religion, sexual orientation, gender identity, socio-economic background someone is we are all susceptible.
16) Being you is the best person you can be.
No one else can be you except you. Trying to be someone else is just being a second rate version of them.
17) Every human is equal.
We all have a brain, a heart, & lungs. We all bleed. There’s is nothing that makes one of us better than another. If we were born in a different environment or had different experiences we might be someone else entirely.
18) Your experience in a situation will be different then someone in the same situation.
Our beliefs, perceptions, opinions & past experiences taint our current experiences. That doesn’t make anyone right or wrong.
19) No one is safe from adversity.
We all experience it in our lifetimes. Adversity doesn’t discriminate.
20) Hard is hard.
Who really wants to win the game of who has it harder. I know I don’t.
21) No one can tell you how you feel or how you are suppose to feel.
Our feelings are ours alone. No one has the right to dictate that.
22) Success is individual.
Your definition of success and my definition of success are two different things. Don’t let anyone dictate that for you.
23) There can be more than one right answer.
So many times we see things in black and white when actually there is a whole spectrum of color out there. Sometimes there can be more than one right answer for the same question.
24) Your intuition is one of the most valuable tools you have.
25) You can never say what you would do until you’ve been in that exact situation under those exact circumstance.
Today I saw someone say “I would never take my own life.” This is someone who stated they have also never experienced mental illness. You don’t know until you are there.
26) It is never to late to pursue your dreams.
I know women who have pursued a new career later in life. They are rocking it too!
27) Just because someone’s life choice isn’t your own doesn’t mean they are wrong.
We just naturally want to be right but leave it be. Just because you do something doesn’t make it right. It would be so boring if we were all alike.
28) Our experiences shape who we are but that doesn’t mean we are stuck that way.
At any point in time we can decide this is not how our story ends.
29) Someone’s opinion about you has very little to do with you and everything to do with them.
It’s all about their beliefs, perceptions, and insecurities. Their judgments about you have so much to do with that. Until they work through those it won’t matter what you do.
30) Apologies are absolutely necessary.
If you do something wrong apologize. If you hurt someone’s feelings unintentionally apologize for hurting their feelings but don’t apologize for what you did not say/do.
31) You don’t need another person to complete you.
You are more than enough just as you are. Don’t put that kind of expectation on someone else.
32) It’s 100% acceptable to ask for help when you need it.
Whether it’s seeking out a therapist or asking you spouse to help more around the house or asking your friend to watch your cats. The worst thing that they can do is say no.
That’s it! I’m sure there are more things I have learned but I’ll keep it to 32. I would love to hear what lessons you’ve learned just comment below. Remember YOU ARE BRAVE, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, YOU ARE AMAZING, & YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!